"While we are averting one danger, we may be unsuspectingly creating another".
Dr. Alice Chen
It’s not often you literally drop everything to listen to an expert, but that’s exactly what I did this week. Dr. Alice Chen is an adjunct professor at the University of California, a physician, and the founder of Doctors for America. Her specialty of late has been to raise the alarm on the potential mental health fallout of the Covid crisis.
Chen's interview on CBC's Tapestry, and her accompanying article in the Atlantic, 'America Faces a Social Recession', is fascinating stuff (links to both can be found below).
Yes, self isolation and social distancing continue to be necessary. Though there are glimmers of hope around the globe, and some lightening of the rules, we’ve accepted that our new ‘normal’ may look like this for some time.
However, Dr. Chen’s research proves that it remains critical to flex our social muscles, and just like any muscle in your body, they can atrophy if left unused.
We’re Social Animals
We have an innate need to be with others. It’s baked into our very DNA, and throughout human history it has meant survival. As our social limitations turn from weeks to months, this is worth paying attention to.
Whether you’re an introvert or extrovert matters, but not as much as you think. Introverts need less face time than extroverts - but that doesn’t mean they can go it alone. According to Chen, letting our social skills fall by the wayside has very real risks to our physical and mental health.
The nervous system reads social isolation as a constant state of low level stress. The result? An increased risk of heart disease, depression, anxiety, and substance abuse. She likens the physical toll of loneliness to smoking 15 cigarettes a day (Egads! At this point my jaw dropped open).
How to Stay Connected
This is no ordinary time, but with a little ingenuity, it is indeed possible to make a difference. Small changes often reap big rewards.
First and foremost, please, pretty please, if you’re feeling lonely, if you have bouts of sadness, if you don’t know how this will end, don’t despair! Knowledge is power, my friend. You’ve come to the right place if you want to make lemonade out of lemons.
What follows are some creative solutions for flexing your social prowess during present measures. None of us is immune to feelings of isolation, especially now, but we do have some powerful tools at our disposal.
1. Reach out. Call friends and family, but just as importantly, call someone you normally wouldn’t. Someone you’ve thought of and wondered about. It may make their day - and yours too.
2. Set aside time for those who are most important to you. My yoga mat reads “that which matters the least should never give way to that which matters the most”. True. Shuffle your deck accordingly.
3. Prioritize seeing actual people where you can. Chat with a neighbour, meet a friend for a walk, make eye contact as you do your errands, spread cheer wherever your day takes you.
4. Use FaceTime or Zoom (or whatever visual platform strikes your fancy). Even if you can’t get out, this is a close second.
5. Be of service. Who can you help? Is there an elderly or isolated neighbour who can use groceries or a helping hand?
6. If you need help, don’t be afraid to ask for it. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with being vulnerable, and the people in your life may not be aware you’re in distress. As the classic song goes,
”Lean on me, when you're not strong
And I'll be your friend
I'll help you carry on
For it won't be long
'Til I'm gonna need
Somebody to lean on”
We all lean on others at some point in our lives. Needing a helping hand is far from a sign of weakness. In fact, our mutual connectedness is our greatest strength, and in the end, it may well be our salvation.
Resources
Dr. Alice Chen’s interview (and links to the podcast)
America Faces a Social Recession
10 Mental Health Resources for All Ages
Life’s Little Instructions
Heather Martin is a Naturopath & Wellness Coach living in Montreal, Canada. She is the founder of The Acorn Wellness and lectures on the topic of accessible wellness for all. Heather has contributed to various publications, including Mantra Mag, Medium, and the Globe & Mail. Her first book, The Wheel of Wellness, will be published later this year.
